Five months home and I find myself back at college. Its been quite a while since I've been in a classroom setting, but I'd say I've been adjusting pretty well. I've reached that point in my schooling that I get to take classes that I enjoy, rather than just the required credits. I'm loving every second.
However, school isn't what I want to talk about today.
I've recently been going through a personal trial, much like the ones that you've been through or may be dealing with right now. And much like my prideful self, I've been trying to handle it all on my own. And much like my selfish self, I haven't been paying much attention to anyone around me. So basically, unlike anything I learned on my mission. Its crazy how fast some lessons can be forgotten. Going through the motions day by day: wake up, go to work, go to school, come home, do homework, watch movies, go to bed, repeat. All I can think about is myself and my trial. Constantly looking inward, trying to sort things out in my mind. Trying not to feel, I would do my daily scripture study out of habit more than really searching for truth or answers. I would pray but not for very long. I guess I was afraid that if I opened up to God that I might break. And I couldn't let that happen. Besides, this wasn't anything I couldn't figure out on my own. Right?
Yesterday I was reminded of the flaw in this logic. I felt very humbled as a friend reminded me of the importance of meaningful prayer, and later that same day received multiple reminders of how much God really does love me and is listening to my prayers. Tender mercies.
When we go through life, its easy to get caught up in a monotonous pattern of simply going through the motions. So easy to exist, rather than live. When we are given trials, its in our nature to want to handle them on our own. Its in our nature to look inward, and stop seeing the world around us. But that's not what life is for and that's not why we are given trials. We need to live. There will always be trials. There's always another mountain to climb, battle to fight, or puzzle to solve. But we are not alone. God, our Father in Heaven is watching over us, and will help us through these trials if we let Him. We may feel like the only person in the world who understands what its like, but that's not true. Our Savior Jesus Christ knows exactly how we feel:
"And he shall go forth, suffering pains an afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains an the sicknesses of his people. And he will take upon him death, that he may loose the bans of death which bind his people; and he will take up him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities." (Book of Mormon, Alma 7:11-12)The answers that I received to my prayers yesterday came in the form of text messages and snap chats from three different people. They were simple, but they were exactly what I needed at the moment I got them. I don't know what prompted my three completely different, unconnected friends to contact me, but they did it. And it was an answer to my prayer. Because they were reaching out rather than in, I felt lifted and loved. How simple it must have been for them to send those messages. But how many times do we think to ourselves, "I should call this person," and then never get around to it? How often do we think, "I should say hi to that person," but our voices stay silent? I know I'm guilty of it. Its so important that we follow these promptings and reach out to others. Because we never know when we're going to be the answer to someone else's prayer.
